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Deviant for 14 Years
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Last Breath by haliwa87
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Random Favourites

Literature
Tainted Love
Fell into a tainted love
Disloyal to the one I know
Tested by the above
Failed the test I know I show
Are lives connected from the start
Loved you for as long I lived
But now you feel the need to part
I have nothing more for you to give
You made me fall in love with you
After hours on the phone
Though I loved you long and true
Now you left me all alone
I know it hurts to love me back
Because I have a tie to hold
The freedom to love I lack
But my heart has formed new mold
It hurts to say that I am new
My love to you is more than true
I wish you knew what you meant to me
You're everything I want to be
But I don't want to hurt you more
So ill say, and part with this
As I left you, my heart tore
I leave you with this one last kiss
Goodbye.
:iconjustme96:justme96
:iconjustme96:justme96 1 6
Literature
Message to a Boy
Message to a Boy
Dear Boy,
I'm sending you this message, with a gift included
I know you may not want it
Maybe you'll say it's a burden
I'm sorry to inconvenience you, but I don't have a choice
I've sent my heart to you
Wrapped up tight in layers of love
It'll be shaken, maybe a little rattled
But just treat it nice
The scars have names printed across them
My heart tries not to forget
The bruises are new and soon will fade
There's no need to worry about those
Dear Boy
My heart is not fragile; it's not made of china
But please, please try not to drop it
I have only one, so should you break this one
There is no spare
Do you see the stubs?
One on each side…
My heart had wings once, big and beautiful
They flew me to the ends of time and back
Years passed, the wings became marred
Torn, broken, and unsteady, till they just fell off
They'll grow back if given time and given love
Can you do that for me?
Dear Boy,
I send this gift to you freely
I don't want it back
I just ask that you treat it
:iconladyr:ladyr
:iconladyr:ladyr 8 41
Cruel Intentions by kllroy Cruel Intentions :iconkllroy:kllroy 1 6
Literature
when the silence comes
Tears stream down her distraught face
Clawing at the floor
Catching nails on the carpet
Needing something desperately to hold onto
Sobbing in the darkness
Silence in the house
Except for the hitches in her breathing
Wishing the clock would just rewind itself
Trying to smile at the thought of something familiar
Failing miserably again
Chaotic thinking, thoughts vanishing in thin air
The crying starts subsiding
But the pain does not
The bubbling of failure causing sickness to rise
Realizing that she all alone
In an empty house
Where all her fears are trailing at her heels
Waiting for her to trip one more time
The tears are useless
Sobs unheard
A heart breaking
With one closing of a door
:iconbitterxsxtears:bitterxsxtears
:iconbitterxsxtears:bitterxsxtears 1 5
Literature
The Contortionist
Heals up,
knees bent
stare at him from behind closed eyelids
with your palms out
just balance in his grasp
on the tight rope of pure ectasy
falling into oblivion on his chest
and
Change positions now-
heals behind your head
knees weak and
left to equate
his touch into
something electric
or rendered to a mess
a mess
on his sheets
as he turns to you
and smiles meakly
like he just bruised
your innocence
and you don't mind
The marks he's left
are more colorful than black and blue
as theyre strewn across your neck
and you
Need to feel him one last time
in the deepest folds of the
longest nights
so its down on all fours
with your hands pulling out the grass
blade by blade
as he takes you in the...
and its done.
Better than you expected
as it keeps
getting more and more
tempting
to sucumb to his biting lip
and postion yourself exactly where he wants you,
his little contortionist.
:iconnostalgicstar:nostalgicstar
:iconnostalgicstar:nostalgicstar 6 12
Literature
-Disease Destroying-
Routine activities drive my mind insane
Bordem eating away at each nerve
Breathing becomes a life sentence.
With every passing day this disease becomes worse,
Ripping at my flesh- and once through the surface- destroying the insides.
This plague is not satisfied,
The insides are dead and bloodless.
It was to late to even feed off of- my body-forgotten and good for nothing
Lying on the floor rotting,
Only the stench to remind others how untolerable and unworthy my life was.
:iconbeeks87:beeks87
:iconbeeks87:beeks87 1 1
Literature
Something About Caring
The ache of your sympathy
is showing signs of cowardice,
something
you
are
not
suppose
to expose.
I fear damaging what
broad of an ego you have
I fear that
these feeble accusations might consume me
and the reality of who I am may be out casted by what you falsely portray yourself to be
But its okay if you steal the blood straight from my genes
and its perfect for you to propagate every feeling you know that I possess
for the strengthing of your defense
or the muscles in your tongue
so you can rehash every word I've just said
and spit them
back
in
my
face
When you don't belong anywhere near me to begin with.
:iconnostalgicstar:nostalgicstar
:iconnostalgicstar:nostalgicstar 1 4
-Take A Stand- by twisted-whirl -Take A Stand- :icontwisted-whirl:twisted-whirl 2 3
Literature
Charm Bracelet
Here I sit on my crooked matress in my cluttered room
Amongst teddy bears and old pictures
74 seconds of life lay before me
And not one face is the same to this day
Each pair of eyes tells a new story
Do you remember your first crush?
I do.
I was only 5 and desperatly infatuated for years
He lived down the street and had no interest in me
He's my best friend now.
Do you remember your first true friend?
I do.
She lived next door to me
And she liked the same boy
He didn't really like either one of us though
I'm sure I would laugh with her today
Too bad I don't know her anymore.
It's funny how time changes us all
How uncanny your smile seems
So forced and desperate
Desperate for the dreams you used to know so well
I used to want to be a singer
And a vet on the side
There was nothing I loved more than my cats
Too bad they have gone away too
I never really said goodbye though
Do you remember when time was infinite?
I do.
I remember when we went to school to learn
And not to get silly
:icontaintedserenity:taintedserenity
:icontaintedserenity:taintedserenity 3 6
Literature
r ap ture
The tiles collide,
my colors fade
Silence here…
A vapor lingers,
I cannot let go.
Quickly, yet too slow for pace
I leap
into a dream,
eyes open – vacant
I hear your heart!
and I sink.
:icondiscontentbeauty:discontentbeauty
:icondiscontentbeauty:discontentbeauty 1 6
Literature
glow, child, glow
I want to
ask how you are
and
know what you've felt
To see you smile,
Hear your words
would wake my soul,
and dissolve all I've been into
some profound liquid mess
I'm dead here,
Life is only air
Breathe in -  breathe out
Assert once more and
Twinkle out of time
Naturally -
another stunning performance.
Yet,
my foundation is crumbling,
this isn't what I thought
Internally,
I bleed for you
Searing pain shoots through my veins
and I tumble
down,
down
down so deep – I no longer feel me
Tears that weren't,
tears that couldn't be,
finally formulate and linger steadily …
I'm forced to grip the edge of the past
Yesterday,
I realized that if
the world would end today
I'd spend my last precious moments
wishing I had you.
:icondiscontentbeauty:discontentbeauty
:icondiscontentbeauty:discontentbeauty 4 16
Literature
-ScrewDriver FreeWrite-
Staring at the wall again, with nothing to hide
You let your emotions run rapid
Youre a lost soul
Searching to know your barriers and limit yourself to YOUR expectations
So you do it
Punching and creating a giant hole in the wall
Counts for the holes in your heart
Oh, about 35 of them
Crying red tears that are full of rage,
And they run into your mouth,
Tasting the saltyness of pain
You leave the wall, broke open,
Only to stream down the stairs into the garage,
Where you know your dad keeps his exacto knife
Visions blurry, so you run into things on the way out
Searching for your only escape,
And youre twitching now because you cant find it
Opening, closing, opening, closing again
Youve been through every drawer at least three times
Still, no sign of it
So you get a screwdriver
Thatll do
Reaching out and placing your arm on the tool bench
Wrist up
You stab the screwdriver through your arm, right where the vein is
Screaming because it hurts so bad,
And you hate the pain,
But you hate him
:icontwisted-whirl:twisted-whirl
:icontwisted-whirl:twisted-whirl 1 1
Literature
Indifferent
Standing in my corner
Facing the walls surrounding me
I watch you.
I stare through closed eyes
At the child inside of you
The one that is
Wishing to be neglected
Waiting to be punished
Dying to be banished from your own territory
Thoughts steer themselves throughout me
A child unborn, but known
Screams for the mother to wrap the blanket
Like folding fresh laundry bound to your body
Our eyes met unconciously
And I cried, only because I had waited so long
Caught off guard, you pour me out
And down the drain I go
Secrets, Demons, Memories
Inner most thoughts
There goes everything
We are indifferent.
:icontaintedserenity:taintedserenity
:icontaintedserenity:taintedserenity 1 2
Literature
Boxing Day
Tonight is the night that i always dread
The night that 3 years ago u nearly ended up dead
Tell me dear mother what was going through your mind?
Your children were still here but you were blind
Who would have been there to watch our backs?
If you hadn't survived lying in the bath-
Because thats where they found you with a bottle of wine
And a packet of pills you had been popping all the time....
As I approached the house, he wouldn't let me in
So i knew something was wrong, my head began to spin.
I knew where i was going though, what i needed to do.
I needed to get in but if he'd just let me through.
See i've been denied access places all of my life,
People telling i'm not good enough- not tonight.
So i pushed my way past him through the door
I recognised crying and a voice i recalled
I looked straight at her whilst she was talking on the phone,
Pleading for my stepdad to hurry on home,
And then i saw them, the blue lights through the window
As i was staring she was telling me to go
Bu
:iconyoungandsuicidal:youngandsuicidal
:iconyoungandsuicidal:youngandsuicidal 1 1
Literature
Morning Hello
It wasnt until i woke up without your morning hello
that i noticed your smile
was diced by black daggers
and strewn across the window panes
And it took awhile
before the sun started climbing rung by rung
to escape my gaze
Now all light and warmth and touch
are out of sight
And im taking the wooden panels
three at a time
to chase after them
but its useless
I'm useless without you
Your hands are creating angles over the clock
and im waiting for the second you will
stop
and just look at me
Look at me and tell me that i am the cute gesture in your dimple
that i am sweeter than any other
but there are tremors between the sheets
that keep you at bay
and i cant help but wonder where you were
when i was slipping through your fingers
Im so empty in an empty change of seasons
The cold is irresistable to this
burning ire flooding my eyes
I missed you
forever
because you werent ever there at all
and it seems that your morning hello
was the birth of a life meant
to live to die
:iconnostalgicstar:nostalgicstar
:iconnostalgicstar:nostalgicstar 2 3
Literature
no one lives at home
the screen glares
and reflects in my eyes
those tired eyes
that not long ago saw you
and that wished
they had stayed.
home has given
nothing but torture
pain
and hurt.
here,
no one cares.
no one loves.
no one lives.
no one lives at home.
i am alone
in the long corridors
of my heart.
feigned care
is lurking around the corner
but do i need
the fake love that ensues?
i don't know.
i am alone.
i wish i knew how to get
out.
he rolled over.
he went to sleep.
i layed on his chest.
wanting more.
wanting love.
wanting a hug.
wanting anything.
the only thing i got
was a snore.
is love really so lonely?
we may never know.
i wish i knew.
:iconbloodykisses05:bloodykisses05
:iconbloodykisses05:bloodykisses05 1 11

Activity


deviantID

haliwa87
Halina
Artist | Hobbyist | Other
Canada
Current Residence: Hamilton
Favourite genre of music: anything that sounds good to me :)
Operating System: lungs, heart, brain, blood.
Favourite cartoon character: stewie and ernie :D
Personal Quote: the silence screams to be broken
Interests
Every couple of years or so, it seems that I return to this place. I love this community, I miss this community. This is where I grew up, this is where I have met some of the best people I have ever come into contact with via the Internet. I really do hope everyone is alive and well, and would appreciate a message or two! I will be periodically checking back and possibly returning with some new posts! I feel a change, and this community has helped me change before. Good vibes, always.

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconbrownshagcarpet:
brownshagcarpet Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2011   Photographer
I see that someone's birthday is coming up soooon! Do you have facebook woman?
Reply
:iconbrownshagcarpet:
brownshagcarpet Featured By Owner Jan 22, 2011   Photographer
I see that someone's birthday is coming up soooon! Do you have facebook woman?
Reply
:iconbrownshagcarpet:
brownshagcarpet Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2011   Photographer
ooooooo buddy! thanks for the fav! <3
Reply
:icontwisted-whirl:
twisted-whirl Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2009
hey girl how goes ittt???
:hug:
Reply
:icondiscontentbeauty:
discontentbeauty Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
:weed:

;p
Reply
:iconalexandreguilbeault:
AlexandreGuilbeault Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2009  Professional Photographer
Hey! I'm glad you watch me backk :P
Greeting from Montreal
Reply
:iconhaliwa87:
haliwa87 Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2009  Hobbyist Artist
:) you've got a great gallery,id be an idiot not to watch you :w00t:
Reply
:icontakemetoanotherplace:
Thanks :)
Reply
:icontakemetoanotherplace:
I like your stuff, im going to watch you :)
Reply
:iconhaliwa87:
haliwa87 Featured By Owner Jul 31, 2009  Hobbyist Artist
same to you! i just added you to my watch .
Reply
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